Lost sheep needs help

[searching]

About seven years ago I joined a men's group, it was the best and worst thing that has ever happened to me. It was the best, because it appeared that I had found my way, and I committed myself and then some. It was the worst, because one day in a meeting amongst my group, the Reverend let out something which I had mentioned in privacy in a spiritual direction session.

From that day on, I have lost trust, confidence, and perhaps even worst, some of my faith. I don't think it was intentional, but at the time I was very vulnerable, for I was just starting to come out, and I really wanted to be a better catholic. I felt vulnerable, for after confessing my sins, I often wondered if that would someday be revealed as well.

It was a tough blow and sometimes I wonder if it was intentional, for after all, once somebody knows everything about you, then they can have you agree to do just about anything they need done, or one takes the chance of being exposed. -I don't think this was the motive, but when you get somebody in a weak state, it makes one wonder. And needless to say, at the time there was a certain direction they were hoping the group would go, but the group really wasn't interested.

I eventually left the group and have been searching since. This whole experience has taken a toll on my life. In my job I was moving up the ladder, but since then have dropped a couple of pegs. I can go on and on, but the reason I came here, is because I need to let this out once and for all and I really don't know where else to go. I feel abandoned!
Any suggestions?

Thanks

[Catholic Dad]

Thank you for sharing this difficult episode of your life. I am sure it took a lot to open up and retell what happened. I truly hope the priest involved erred in judgement or did not realize what he did. Have you approached him about the episode? You may find he does not realize what has happened or is quite sorry for his error.

I strongly encourage you not to abandon your faith over this. The priest is human and not infallible. How about attending a different parish? Maybe a change of scenery may help to jump start your faith journey. I am sure that the last thing you want is to show your face in a parish where you think your personal information has leaked out for all to see! Are there any other parish nearby which you could attend? How about contacting another priest and ask for guidance from him?

Forgiveness can be very powerful. If you keep this pain in your heart you may never be able to get past it. As the Lord says, "Amen, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven." ( Matthew 18:18 )

The Lord loves you and does not want to lose you. "What is your opinion? If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them goes astray, will he not leave the ninety-nine in the hills and go in search of the stray? And if he finds it, amen, I say to you, he rejoices more over it than over the ninety-nine that did not stray. In just the same way, it is not the will of your heavenly Father that one of these little ones be lost." (Mathew 18:12-14) The Lord wants you to return to his flock. Pray to him for guidance and you shall receive an answer, Jesus tells us:

"Suppose one of you has a friend to whom he goes at midnight and says, 'Friend, lend me three loaves of bread, for a friend of mine has arrived at my house from a journey and I have nothing to offer him,' and he says in reply from within, 'Do not bother me; the door has already been locked and my children and I are already in bed. I cannot get up to give you anything.' I tell you, if he does not get up to give him the loaves because of their friendship, he will get up to give him whatever he needs because of his persistence. And I tell you, ask and you will receive; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives; and the one who seeks, finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened." (Luke 11:5-10)

Trust in the Lord! You may not find the answer right away, but it will come. Pray and be patient!

May the Lord bless you! And I pray that you return to the Church to continue your faith journey.
_________________
John

"Let the sinner not be afraid to approach Me. The flames of mercy are burning Me -- clamoring to be spent; I want to pour them out upon these souls." --- from Divine Mercy in My Soul, Diary of Saint Maria Faustina Kowalska, page 18.

[alex95610]

I can only echo what Catholic Dad said. I can't imagine the betrayl you felt! Turn to Our Lord, ask him to strengthen your faith,pray for that priest. Perhaps in the future you could start such conversations with "Bless me father for I hav sinned..." from what I heard this would place the context of the conversation under the seal of confession. Or simply ask for that. The key thing is not to give up everybody's faith is tested and we all have something that impedes our spiritual growth we must perserve. To paraphrase Fr. Corpai when wounded in battle don't desert but have your wounds healed and go back to battle. I will pray for you

[searching]

I did stop attending that particular church, but the thoughts and feelings followed me. Being able to finally vent and receive feedback has been very therapeutic for me. Thank you both for your input, it has made a difference.

[Jeremiah]

I'm sorry to hear of this great hardship! You mentioned that this happened seven years ago, so this has certainly been a while.

I agree with the other two posts that God will not abandon you although sometimes he does feel distant. Perhaps this is a time when he is very close to you and is ready to guide you forwards after these difficult seven years. God may very well have great things in line for you.

Christ is the only true source of hope, peace, and fulfillment in life. I encourage you to come to him with an open heart and see what path he wants you to take. Perhaps it would help to find a priest that you see as a holy man, and then speak to him. If you're more comfortable, you could speak to him, particularly at first in the sacrament of reconcilation. Remember, that the priest in confession is there present, however, Christ is the one listening and the one who forgives sins.

In regards to the priest you spoke of, I would assume that he did not intentionally mention these private topics. I hope that is the case. In any case, I encourage you to ask God to guide this priest to tend to his flock as a holy instrument of Christ.

I'm sorry I can't be of more help. I really think looking around a bit for a priest you see as a holy man and going to him in confession and addressing these concerns is a solid first step. Also, I think it would be good to ask him what approach you need to take while in the sacrament of reconciliation.

May God Bless you and you can count on my prayers.

[searching]

Yes, I agree that Christ is the only true source of hope, peace and fulfillment. Ironically it was through this same priest that I discovered the great love of our Lord. I have never felt the same peace anywhere else, and then in a moment it was taken away. Sometimes I felt that God had distanced himself from me, and there is no lonelier feeling than that.
It's been a hard climb back, and I keep climbing. Perhaps I had to suffer what I did in order to learn something our Lord wanted me to learn. I only wish He would have written me a letter instead.
I could go on, but I'll leave it at that. -I really want to find the road I'm supposed to follow.

Thanks again to all, your words have helped me let go.

[Junirs]

Helo!

I'd like to say I'm very glad, because I joined to us now, and I just want to meet some friends to talk about how I'm trying to be a better catholic.
Actually, I live in Brazil and I'm still learning english.
In this week I can feel closer to God, because I went to Mass last Sunday, and I'm trying to find my mission and my way again!
I want to be a new guy, doing God's will and help Him to change the world into a better place, where we can live like brethens.
Brazil is a great nation, because here most of people are catholics, but
unfortunately, people just forgot God, that's why I'm here, fiding new guys to talk about our faith!

So, I want say thank you God!
And ask for your help, please
Help me to be closer to God!
Thank You !

[Rosalia]

Hello Juniors,

I'm from Brazil too!

This is what you do, go to your parish priest and tell him, Father how can I help? Believe me, he will have tons of projects that you can work on.

Pray the Rosary daily, and go to Mass as often as possible, daily if possible. Our Lord will guide you!

"Blessed are those who seek because they will find."

It's a blessing to have you here!

Peace,

Rosalia
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Thy Kingdom Come!

[queeny]

open our hearts and mind to those in need and the doors of heaven will also open to us.



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Queeny Brunk